Dosa Disaster

So last night we had Dosa, I enjoy dosa because the dosa its self is not spicy (usually) and if I remove all the filling this is something I can eat Whilst in India.

So occasionally we have Dosa at home.

which is made from a packet mix of course because..well Life is just easier that way. So instead of using the normal brand Gits we picked up some other brand and I found the whole experience more traumatic than normal dosa making.

Firstly the mix tasted like it contained too much BiCarbonate of Soda and

secondly it was bubbling like yeast on my ( trudged all the way back in my hand luggage from India) Dosa Pan.

Which contrary to what you may think will NOT assist you in anyway for making dosa it is merely a flat pan that does nothing more than get hot and in

my case burn the arse off my dosa.

It does not pour, flip or roll your dosa's for you, nor does it fill them with yummy stuffing.

basically you are on your own for all of that.

I do recall having a successful Dosa or 2 over the 5 years I have been making them but as to what went right or how I did it I don't know.

My dosa's even with the GITS mix are floppy little sad sacks, I have tried thick, thin, low heat, high heat and have even tried chanting

Ommm Ommm

make my dosa's work

make them crispy and light

so we can enjoy

yummy Dosa tonight.

Ommm Ommm

but still my dosa need divine intervention.

Here is a picture of a Pro at work.. If anyone has some helpful tips I would appreciate it. Remember what the dosa man says...

"No good dosa turn goes unflipped"

Perfect Indian Wife

This post has been deleted....

Hi.. sorry this post got deleted cause it was suggested that it was a little too obvious who the post was about...

so its gone..

but feel free to discuss it further...

to cut a long story short its about meeting expectations of being a "Perfect Indian Wife"
something I know I will never be... but I am still jealous of those who have been labeled this by people around me.

Shopping Indian Style

Shopping this is something I enjoy in every country and India is no exception to that.

I find the mall's easier to shop in, though obvioulsy more exepensive
(read more about Indian malls on my previous post)

This picture is us at a Sari Sale , I was looking for something specific and of course being fuzzy that I am we left with nothing after over an hour or rummaging through piles and piles of sari's.

I find it difficult to shop in India because as soon as the stall holders start pulling me in I feel intimidated, pressured and dont buy anything. Shopping with family is quite similar, I feel pressured to make quick decisions and ofcourse they always say Iam paying too much.

but it has to be kept in mind, whats too much for them is still a bargain for me... and if the alternative is going home without anything than Id rather pay an extra dollar or two to avoid dissapointment.

For some reason shopping ALWAYS get's left till last... hubby doesnt want to shop plus we are always with family.. it would be nice once and a while to be let out together to go shopping alone.

I usually use shopping as my "excitement builder" when going to India I focus on all the lovely things I can buy and try to stay unstressed.. so when I dont actually get to go shopping I am dissapointed.. Usualy Mumiji takes my shopping list and goes and gets it for me on the last day..

Which is great, but also not my own selection or shopping..

hence why I like the malls with supermarkets full of stuff on the shelves.. i can browse , look think and then buy...

I try strictly to buy only things we have a place for.. but that doesnt always work... I have to draw a line somewhere right or Id buy anything and everything..


This is me shopping at Choki Dani a Indian themed village hotel.
The prices were too high but still a bargain I bought a very beautiful silver box..

This is Didi and I shopping at Delhi Hart Bazaar again its a tourist bazaar but its decent shopping with food and toilets and a bazaar for every state of India, even the local shop here Including Didi who bought those cushion covers , I bought some ponchos and knick nacks for taking home as gifts.

Things I would like to buy in India..

*A Baby Elephant!

*My own Salwaars and saris

*An orphaned child or two

*Biggest Ganesh statue posisble for my yard

*Antique Indian Furniture and oh so much more...

8 Years.. 2920 Days...70080 Hours

This is how long it has been since I first met my husband...

10 of decemeber 1996 I started chatting online to a guy with the nickname "sam.."
We were the only two in the chat room called broadcast which doesnt even exist anymore.......

We chatted for 10 hours straight.... We never stopped from that moment on......

now it's 8 years later and we are getting ready for our 4th Christmas together as husband and wife.....

gee time flies when your with the one you love....

Sari's & Salwar's worthy of a mention

So I have been clicking on my google ad's (above) for sari stores and have come across some very interesting designs worthy of a mention

Let's start with the damn right crazy prints.



Way to expensive Sari

then we have the wear would it be worn list
fashion wear? Little crazy looking

Wedding Sari?

As I have never bought my own suit, and don't get chance to go shopping for clothes in Indian because we usually have people with us and well I am the slowest and worst clothes shopper in the world I have composed a wish list. Not necessarily a list of ones I actually want, but styles Id certainly like to try one to see how they look.

while buying online would be easier and I could compose my own collection of clothes from the comfort of my own home I do find the process extremely unrealistic and don't intend to pay $100's of dollars for things I am sure would be much much less in India. Is it the price of convenience that I just might have to pay ?

Nice style suit Not sure of the color as I have red hair but really like the cut of the top

Nice White Suit Not sure it would stay white on me specially in India but nice and modern

Modern Style Bit bright for my liking but I have worse.

Dress over Pant Style this is a nice dress over the pants style which I like as I do that with my western clothes when I am having a fat day

as for saris personally I prefer georgette cause its OH so much lighter as for colors, I am not sure still Cyber looking.

I really wish all those Indian models were not so pretty though.. Maybe they should design a store with western models for us GoriGirls.

Where does everyone else shop ? What's your favorite sari? Have a picture or it ?

Ok so here are a few pics of me wearing sari's and Salwaars.

Pictures

This is me in my green salwaar with my "I don't like green" Face on.. actually it was my iam totally drained face the morning before the wedding reception... Oh yes that velvet box on my lap is filled with pearls.....









This is a picture of my and Hubby the day of Diwali it would be back in 2003. Nothing comical to say about this one..I dont recall it being very funny at all....















This would be me and my friends in 2004 at our own hosted Diwali Festival.. This red sari is my favourite it is a georgette fabric, very light and I love the red it has silver detailing on it..
My friends were wearing their own saris bought whilst in India backpacking.







This is a Picture of my mum dressed up for Diwali 2004.





















This would be one of my original Salwaar suits, that was given to my by my MIL before marriage at least i think thats where it came from... I like the color and the black Chunni which you can't see.
this is the "welcoming ceremony" as we enter the house as husband and wife for the first time.



Thats all I seem to have of me in Indian clothes.. which really isnt very good considering I have been married for 4 years..
Maybe I will have to capture those moments more..if not only for the blog.. but is anyone really interested in seeing what I wear?? I think not...

The Indian Influence

Things I find myself doing now that I am married to an Indian.

This isnt the top 10 list, just the first 10 I can think of right now..

1: Washing the dishes under running water

2: Never leaving the house immediately after sneezing

3: Drinking more water

4: Watching Indian Cooking Shows

5: Watching Indian Travel Shows

6: Humming to Indian Bollywood Songs

7: Watching what I do with my feet

8: Laughing at T.V Program "Kumars at No 42"

9: Laughing at T.V Program Goodness Gracious Me

10: Shopping for Saree's and Salwaars

11: Writing a Blog

Pics

I have added some pics to the previous posts. not sure if I really want to do that.. but hey I have done... for now atleast.

Salwaar Kameez

I'm still learning the differences between the names of the suits..It seems to vary quite a bit when I'm being told, but as far as I am concerned they are all Salwaar Suits..

I have never bought my own Suit or Sari, they have always been bought for me, in a great range of undesirable colors, I have a few favorites which I wear again and again as to retain my own level of comfortabilty when in a weird situation such as temple visits or visiting relative etc.

I actually prefer to wear Sari's as firstly you can use pins and secondly the fabric is wrapped around me not wrapped between my legs. Though I have all my blouses made longer as I don't like to show my stomach.. Exposed ROlls just isnt right..


The suit pants, the first time I tried one on was with the aid of my sister in law, I pulled them up over my backside and yes. The waist string went all the way through..Obviously a critical error on their part at just how big my backside was.

So the cord was extended much to my embarrassment and some knots were tied into the ends to prevent the GoriGirl from pulling them out. I was asked if I had ever worn a string waist before. I was almost offended but too embarrassed to explain it wasn't me it was the short string..

So I have them on and I am thinking something is wrong.. Why is there so much fabric in between my legs? So I fiddle around and adjust the crutch over and over again.
Still confused as to why there is a wad of fabric so thick between my legs that it feels like a oversized sanitary towel.

I still have not come to term with this and take my pants off as soon as I can when ever wearing a suit..

Now for the chuni, why can't I keep it on ? If its not hard enough getting it to be the same length I can never ever keep mine on.

I move it slips
I cook it burns
I walk it drags
I use a toilet it gets washed
I pull it forward
I pull it back
I fall short of taking the bloody thing off and doing without.

I have got to the car before trying to leave it behind, but then someone usually tells me I have forgotten it only to get into the car and slam it into the door, but I only find out once we reach our destination.. It then had a lovely shaded brown side...

And if I sit down I sit on the ends and choke myself, this happened last year whilst I was at my very first Indian wedding, some how we were invited up into the front where the bride and groom were sitting and we had to climb over aunts and uncles and finally we are placed into our spot. There was around 100 eyes on us and me only one of about 5 westerners (he was marrying an American)so feeling conscious I sit down quickly ...And UGHHHHHHH

I sit on the ends of my chuni, its so tight around my neck I cant breath, So I wiggle a bit and try to pull it out a little.. My butt lands on some guys foot so I wiggle back and try to discretely tug at the tightening noose around my neck.
after about 20 mins of tugging at it I am able to swollow with ease. I believe the ring ceremony was nice, I was to busy tugging for my life.

I have since learnt to pull it out before I sit... Consider it a lesson learnt..

Licking Chicken Good

last night at 3am I could not sleep some how I was recalling a not so funny meal time In India.

I am not very tolerant of spice and by now my In-laws know this, though occasionally they think my tolerance has improved and have me taste something spicy. My brother actually says your taste buds re-new themselves every week.. So maybe next week I'll be better.

Anyways...


The story....

So we are at a local shopping mall with Hubbys brother in law jiaji
(Sisters husband ..We all know the status of that right?) anyways.. So he goes on a mission to help sort out the westerner with food.

He is gone for ages and is talking to the men behind the chicken counter, eventually he calls me over to Check the chicken.

"Here try this its not too spicy"
He passes me the chicken coated in bright red curry to try..
I am thinking.. "Are you serious? Its obviously hot" I am also thinking
"Raw chicken and I'm lickin it. Oh yeah I'm going to die today"

So obviously it is TOO HOT... My mouth is burning and despite my better judgment I once and for all say "No I'm sorry Its too Hot"

So... He has his ,behind the counter staff Wash it for me..

So after 20-30 mins a plate of washed but hey now its cooked at least chicken comes to my table.. Jiagi offer it to me and says I hope that is ok for you. Mean while he munches on his whole pickled chili that he MUST have with each meal.

So I take a bite of the chicken.. "Oh Shit!! It's hot" Thinking I can not embarrass anyone here because he has gone to such effort I will just have to eat it. He ask's me if its ok.. And I very politely say yes. Thinking the faster I eat it the better.

At first it was ok, the mucus in my nose was not running too fast and every bite or so I could sneak a wipe with the napkin.

I am literally squirming in my seat with the onset of a raging fire in my mouth. Trying to catch Hubby's eye I wonder why the hell did I demand he sit next to me..For once he actually listened but I needed him to be within eye glance so I could confess my pain with a few flicks of the eyelids.

After 20 napkins and 1/2 a bottle of water hubby suspects something is up and asks me if its ok. I mumble a NO under my breath....

He then asks me to try someone else's dish which is curd based so I can cool off my mouth..hmm nice I say. That's nice.. So I get some more. And politely offer my chicken to everyone....

After 2 pieces I sit back and say.. "gee I am so full" "Such Yummy food"

Surprisingly I didn't die from raw chicken licking. But I did cleanse all my nasal passages and burn my taste buds down 6 days early so they could Re-new them selves quicker. Cause after all it was only a snack till we got home.

Karva Chauth

I had made a list of topics for my blog and my next one was going to be
karva chauth for those who don't know what that is here is a link on Karva Chauth But now it seems a little Try-hard to win back my "U hate Indians" fans. Thats if doing something Indian actually win them back.


But to heck with what's right and what's not this is next on my to-do list and god damn it I hate to skip over my lists.



Karva Chauth has been very very vaguely explained to me via my husband and his knowledge for Indian traditions and festivals it surprisingly limited, if not flexible and inconsistent.

Basically (as I understand it ) is you fast for your husbands well being...not its original concept but it's latest.

I have done this twice in our 3 years of marriage, not sure what happened one year maybe I did it, maybe we forget.. Not really sure. I don't understand the whole thing and basically just do what I am told.

So I didn't wear my wedding lengha or adorn myself in jewels, I did take a shower before my husband came home and geez I even brushed my hair, put some perfume.
(hubby didn't notice my effort) Only that I had forgotten to wear bangles.

The only problem was the moon was no where to be seen, my husband was unsure what to do as there was no moon to pour the milk towards. I figured pouring it into the sky was close enough afterall the moon can not be seen all the time all over the world and there had to be a solution.

I think my husband was considering allowing me to starve until the moon came up, but I was hungry and irritated and once again annoyed about the "flexible beliefs" my husband has. Some how it ended in an argument.. Consumed about thoughts of grabbing the nearest food item just to spite my husbands good will were all too tempting..

But I decided to have a cup of coffee and calm myself down
Hubby decided to ring his mother and find out a solution

By this time we were living in a very hostile environment with tears and yelling and just complete annoyance between us both for very different reasons that had been blown out of proportion by both of us.

His mother told him he had to cook me dinner. I was relieved and felt for a brief moment I was being supported by other women.

And I guess that is the origin of how the Karva Chauth started, Women helping women.

So maybe I got it afterall...

And just as I finish this post Mumiji rings me to check I am ok , not needing any help and not lonely (hubby is away) How is that for coincidence ?

Choose a Topic and Stick With it..

I have just recevied my first critisim about my blog.

Obiously not my first critisim in life cause you dont get this pesimisitc, distrusting,defensive or insecure by being praised your whole life by anyone and everyone.


But it is in fact my first negative comments about Gorigirl. In my defence I will remind the people who read this blog that this is infact a blog about being married to an Indian and the problems encountered. It is not a blog about Cooking,gardening or a blog setup to bash indians.

This is a blog about a "Western girl married to and Indian" (as the title suggests) ..and hence that is what I write about....


It was asked "Why did I bother to marry an Indian"

My only response to that is I didn't Marry a Indian, I married a man who I love and want to spend the rest of my life with and he just happens to be Indian. And that is a very very different thing as far as I am concerned.

Touching Feet...

Now this is something I struggle with..

Touching the feet of elders... Who of you fellow gorigirls do it?
how does it make you feel ?

I feel an overwhelming anxiety come over me around 4 minutes before hand when I know the feet are coming towards me...

My heart thumps my breathing heavy and my senses go..The voices become muffled. The lump in my throat chokes me from with in..
and then..I have to time the swoop for the right moment, as not to trip, fall or embarrass myself.
I have to take one hand to my Chunni to stop if from falling as I bend my head down to below my arse, remembering to keep my arse tucked in to avoid catapulting the person standing behind me into a bum push to the ground.

then..I swoop down. Touch the feet as quickly as possible and proceed to come up for air. Glance around the room to see if anyone is laughing at me or if I have done something wrong. Did it.. Sigh of relief comes over me as I begin again for the next relative.


Hubby usually warns me..
And as I said timing is everything.. Your walking out the door.. Your saying goodbye 10 times, when is the right time?
Now.. No he has turned..
Now... No now she is looking at me funny..
NOW.. Oh god they moved away the moment has passed.
My Husband glares at me.
They are all looking at me to touch the feet..
The palpatations become to great I retract, I retreat.
Oh shit now I am in trouble I didn't touch aunty's feet when I was clearly told to.

I know they are discussing my behaviour.. I know I am in trouble.

But its not easy.. its frightening and scary...


Want to make sure your kids do it right ? Teaching your kids to touch feet

Whats the best thing about being married to an Indian?

Well I started this question off in my group with a variety of answers.

to clarify the question it is about being married to an Indian.. Not just being married..

We all know the up's and down of marriage but "what is the best?" and hey lets go for "what is the worst" thing about being married to an Indian??


Best thing would be..... I am not sure I can actually pic out anything that I could say is an "Indian" thing. But as I asked the question I should also answer it.

So I am going to go for.. Learning a new culture.

but I am also going to add that for the worst thing about being married to an Indian..is the cultural conflicts... especially when it comes to family politics...

There is a highracey I not only dont fully understand but I dont agree with.. everyone is equal in my eye, no matter if they married the girl..or did something or whatever... and in my eyes.. you Earn respect your not automatically granted it.

Baked Beans

Just to go with my Bland food thing..

Last night I had baked beans for dinner..
I even had it cold and out of the can.

Oh the freedom !!!

India Bashing

OK

So I am guilty of Indian Bashing.. But I find it funny but not in a Hahaha way when people India Bash to me... Do they not realise my husband is Indian?

the latest is the Call centre dramas with basically Indian call centre staff being hated here like the plague.. they have become the butt of soooo many jokes and current affair complaints.

But as these people go on and on about it to me personally making comments such as..

"I cant even understand the stupid Indian"
"Wobbling his head no doubt" (probally is actually lol)
"Dont these people have any respect for privacy"
"They are taking over the world" (often thought that actually)

but... I don't know I wouldn't tell fat jokes to someone whois mother was 500kgs...
sooo

Its not my fault my husband has defects..LOL

anyone else encountered this ??

Can Indians Fast?

Hubby is away for 2 weeks so I have been having boiled vegetables and other boring bland food (as my hubby refers to it)

and If I am not hungry well I dont have to bother making something to eat which is nice.. and I can even skip a meal if I want to.

Is it just my Indian husband or do all Indians lack the ability to skip a meal without feeling weak?? or Lathargic??

Why is this ?

Why is a sandwich NOT A Meal
and why isnt soup a Meal?
Why can we eat baked beans and egg for Dinner??
What is so wrong with plain TOast????

The questions go on and on......

Indian Shopping Malls

I have to comment on the Indian shopping Malls...

Since my last visit to india these have popped up all over delhi and numerous malls are in the process of being built..

So what are my thought on these mega shopping cities?? Well as for shopping is concerned I don't find them cheap, but I do find the "Easy"

Easy as in- Airconditioned (no one likes to sweat)
Easy as in- no touts (no one likes to be hassled so much your scared to look)
Easy as in- no Hassles (hey it says it all)
Easy as in- no crowds ( I am noise sensative and crowds..well.. Crowd me)
Easy as in -limited staring.... (staring is traumatic for me)
Easy as in- Clean Toilets..(I admit it..I do HAVE to go a lot)

So for super malls I give them a thumbs up, they are my little westernised sanctuary in a culture that I just don't blend into...

Battle Of The Sexes

I find myself arguing over that word R.E.S.P.E.C.T, but I am not breaking out in song........

I don't think this post is Indian man Versus Gori girl but I believe it is a male versus female thing.

Do all men think they know best? I honestly believe my husband hears BLAH BLAH BLAH when I speak.

I wonder wether my husband, Indian or maybe just male really thinks I know nothing ....or if he just treats me that way.....


note: this post was written after an argument so hostile comments may not being applicable by tomorrow morning... but then again they might.

Indian Beauty Parlors

This topic recently came up whilst chatting to a fellow Gori who is married to an Indian who went through the same thing as me.

My in laws sent me off to the beauty Parlor before our Indian Reception and I am sure they meant well and I am sure it was a tradition that had to be completed as hubby also went off to have stuff done...

The only difference was he came back looking the same and I came back looking quite different. Firstly the Lady had never applied makeup to a westerner so the coloring was wrong and the layer of gold dust didnt soften anything just exagerated my features which left me feeling rather "UNLIKE ME". And when your in an uncomfortable situation thats not the best thing to be feeling....

It was very very different though, my hair was to be curled but the power didnt go on to late and the curling iron wasnt hot and I can't recall exactly why but she was pulling it tightly through my hair and it was hurting like heck.. But Of course being the person that I am I didnt speak out..

I don't think I have ever had as much attention paid to me before or after that day. including the day of my own western wedding...

Mehndi

Mehndi- Is a henna paste that is applied to the hands during a wedding ceremony

I had both my hands and feet done.. it was quite a unreal experience really, to men in the market sat on little stools and applied the henna to me, while a relative sat near to keep me safe.. I had to sit still for over 30 mins while they applied it and then several hours whilst the henna dried.

I had to go home on the scooter with my husband ,with my hands and feet sticking out.
Keep in mind this was the first time I had been on a scooter and not being able to hold on was traumatic to say the least.

The henna was itchy and irritating but I was prompted to leave it on as long as possible to make it dark as possible.


here are some Mehndi Jeans that you can make...

Bleached Mehndi Jeans

Stage Fright

Gee Writing a Blog isnt easy afterall... I am already stumped on what to write about...

the fear of "Going Public" with my thoughts on India.. My Husband and everything else in between has just left me with stage fright !!!

I mean what if my inlaws read something they shouldn't... what if I say something I shouldn't.

Why am I so concerned ? not everything I have to say about India is nice.. Not everything I have to say about my husband is Nice... Iam not always nice..

Namastigi

This blog is a branch off from my Yahoo Goup InsideIndia which was set up several years ago after I met and fell in Love with an Indian Man.

The name Gori- Means - White Girl- hence the title for this blog. Every other name I wanted was taken so I am settling for Gori Girl... it is afterall what I am.

So welcome to my blog